I’m switchin’ gears, bitches. Still no idea who the soulmate is and, frankly, it’s stressing me out so…I’m giving it a rest. And THIS post will actually be organized and not just rambling about whatever is going on in my life. (yaaaaaaaaay).
Today is about control. When I pull my friends’ tarot cards, most of the time I get at least one card that tells them to chill. Let go. give up control. I think this is an issue for everyone. Including me: every time I get stressed or angry, it’s always because I’m trying to control something that I just can’t. I’m worried about this soulmate shiz, because (and don’t ask me why) I’m worried that it’ll be the wrong person. YEAH…explain that one to me. I get angry when other people are dicks. why am I letting these things affect my life!? Bah. This morning, I was unusually not road ragey (gets ma’blood pumpin first thing in the morn) and realized: oh yeah. I can’t control traffic, I’m just giving myself a headache and tons of bad karma while trying to zoom past everyone on the road. My drive was a significantly better drive than normal. Although, we have to consider what listening to Brandi Carlile does to life….LOOOOOOVE HER.
Anyway, sometimes I have these moments of realizing that I can only control me…I can only decide what impact I’m going to have on the world, and I let go of all of these things that aren’t going the way I think they should go. (because, really, who am I to tell the world how to be?) And sometimes I try to control everything in my life and freak out and fall into a big, douchey depression. I think it’s about balance..and accepting myself and the world around me for what it is. Because, my god, it’s fucking beautiful.
In the past few days I’ve fallen in love with so much (and i was even in a total dick mood yesterday!). Obviously, Im in love with Brandi and her music (duh). I fell in love with my friends and how funny they are. With the fun that we have on random weeknights. Peoples’ ability to be so freaking compassionate. My beautiful city, Denver…. with Colorado. Like, I’m sitting in the conference room right now, and this is what I’m looking at:
(here comes some obnoxious positivity) Aren’t we just so freaking lucky!? like…look at those mountains. look at the sky. oh man. LOVE!
ahhh, sometimes you’ve just gotta open up, pause and look around. We’re lucky to be here, gorgeous little blogmonsters. sooooo damn lucky.